Photo by Nicole Buckenham

A new form of ending a relationship has a name, “ghosting.” Ghosting has probably happened to you a lot and you might not have even known it is a thing. Seriously, when was the last time the person you were seeing straight up said to you they no longer want to see you anymore? No one ever just calls things off anymore in person or even on the phone. People just kind of disappear from your life and it is never talked about. Ghosting does not really happen in the form of serious relationships, but rather when casually seeing someone. Maybe when you kissed that person for the first time it just was not quite what you were expecting. Or maybe you did not like something small they did, but it was a big deal to you and instead of telling them you just vanish like a ghost. With tech-savvy communication these days it is really easy to just stop replying when you don’t want to be with someone anymore. If someone stops replying, you just get the hint that it is over and that’s it. So with all this in mind, why is this a trend? Is this the right thing to do? And maybe being ghosted isn’t so bad.

It seems like ghosting is the new trend because it is just so easy to do. You no longer have to have an awkward confrontation about why you are leaving the person you’re leaving. You don’t have to give reasons because maybe you don’t even have a reason for it in the first place. It is just so easy to simply walk out of a person’s life and never have to speak to them again. Also, ghosting is made easy because all we do is text, call and use social media with the person we’re into. If talking via all of those ways of communicating is not happening, then people simply are not communicating at all. Talking through texting is so vital these days that if the other person doesn’t text back enough, there really is not going to be a relationship. It is so easy to just stop replying to someone or be short worded enough that a relationship is obviously called off. Also, if someone is posting pictures through social media of them seeing someone else or doing something you don’t like it is so easy to be done with a relationship that way as well.

Now, the real question is, is this the right thing to do? When you are doing the ghosting it may seem like the right thing to do at the time. You don’t have to face confrontation or have tough conversations. In this case it actually may be good for your health and self-esteem. You’ll never know what you did wrong and that sometimes can be a good thing to just not know. On the other hand, not knowing will seriously drive someone crazy. You will question everything to why the person you were interested in just fell off the face of the earth. It’s not good for the person who just got ghosted unless they’re okay with the whole thing. It is not that hard to send a text message or Facebook message about why you’re simply not into that person anymore. It would help the person’s sanity for them to get some closure.

So, if someone just ghosted you, that means they are too cowardly to tell you the real reason they decided to vanish on you out of nowhere. If someone can’t own up to what is bothering them, why would you want a relationship with them anyways? Yes, it can be scary to be that honest with someone, but they probably have bigger problems as to why they just cut you off like that. Think about it, you don’t really want someone with bigger underlying issues with why they feel they need to avoid confrontation. Relationships are based on communication.